The Blair Witch Project

When Richard Nixon had to resign in 1974 due to his implications in the Watergate scandal, it was a country’s first. When George H. W. Bush threw up on the Prime Minister of Japan in 1991, that was an embarrassment to this country. However, when Heather Donahue, Joshua Leonard, and Michael C. Williams decided to pick up a camera in 1999, it was a tragedy that no man could ever forget. The Lounge presents: The Blair Witch Project review.

With such a…unique movie, it is hard to choose where to start. Basically, this 81 minute snorefest consists of a tape found in the woods which was filmed by three teenage students who disappeared while looking for the mysterious Blair Witch. Heather (the main star), was doing a project on a local legend named the Blair Witch. She has her two friends come along for the ride as they hunt for the urban myth. As they travel through the woods they mess with an ancient burial ground and insanity ensues…sorta.

In actuality this movie is anything but suspenseful. As Brian from Family Guy put it, “Nothing’s happening…nothing’s happening…something bout a witch…nothing’s happening…it’s over…” Normally this segment of the review is preserved for the content of the movie. The only problem is there wasn’t much content at all. Most of the eighty-one minutes takes place with Michael filming, Josh smoking, and Heather whining. The filming in the woods does not help. It creates a hypnotizing feel which prolongs the movie to where you feel as if you have been stuck for three days too. Even the “suspenseful” scenes consist of nothing more than sticks breaking in the distance and Heather screaming. That’s about it. Some say that the terrible acting actually made the movie seem more real. This guy says, “Nooo…”

It must be understood that this movie was originally not meant for wide release. The only reason why it was shown across the board was because of the great promotion given to it. Clips were taken and shown on the internet as if it was a real event. This is perhaps the reason why The Blair Witch Project was the third most successful independent movie made of all time. If you are a fan of shaky cameras, bad acting, and not a lot of action, then this movie is for you. If you want to spend money on a real movie, I suggest you pass up this “hit”. I would have to dub this movie our first ever “Wall of Shame”, giving it a 1 out of 5.

Content Advisory

Sex/Nudity

Not much going there…of course nothing really happens in the movie period.

Violence and Gore

Again, not much. Some bloody teeth are involved, but still. The most violence that occurs is Heather smacking Michael. Yep…

Profanity

This is something that The Blair Witch Project excels at. Senseless cursing fills the ears throughout the entire movie. Definitely not a kid’s movie.

Frightening/Intense Scenes

During the daytime voodoo gear is found; nighttime in the movie is supposedly suspenseful. Twigs crack, Heather screams, and Josh curses. It can be considered intense at times, but it is diluted with the cursing and bad acting.